A One Word Shift That Transformed My Confidence

Growing up, I was often regarded as a promising young man. Many believed in my potential, yet for a long time, I struggled to believe in myself. Later in life, I recognized that a subtle change in language had profoundly affected my confidence during my formative years.

Let me transport you to those early days.

Whenever I encountered an obstacle, the elders in my life typically reassured me with, “You’ll figure it out.”

Though this might seem like a vote of confidence, it always left me with the impression that something magical was supposed to transpire. I'd wait, filled with anticipation, for that magical moment when poof everything would be clear.

What I truly needed to hear was, “You CAN figure it out.” That minor, one word shift would have spared me a lot of anxiety over the years. It would have conveyed that I needed to take ACTION to resolve my issues, rather than waiting for a lightning bolt of magic to strike and solve everything for me.

"You will" implies that events will simply unfold favorably.

"You can" suggests you're empowered to shape outcomes.

This understanding would have freed me from relying on luck and drawn me toward the empowerment of action.

It would have instilled in me the confidence that I am the catalyst making things happen, rather than passively hoping for a serendipitous alignment of events. 

The phrase "You will" had me waiting on destiny, whereas "You can" would have nudged me to marry effort much earlier.

It's fascinating how a minor tweak in language can pivot the course of one's life. I share my story as a testament to the potential within all of us. The difference between being passive and taking action might just be in the words we choose to internalize.

Here's to embracing more 'You can' in our lives.